Through a Glass, Darkly.

Oh Meghan…

(Source: acrowdedstreet)

peashooter85:

The Real Grinch that Stole Christmas,

In the 16th century a sect of protestant Christians formed in England calling themselves the Puritans.  After Henry VIII’s split from the Roman Catholic Church, the Church of England was formed. While separated from Rome, the new Anglican Church was still very Catholic in flavor.  Priests still held mass wearing Roman style vestments, churches were still heavily decorated with statues and paintings, the church still held very ritualistic masses.  The Puritans believed that worship should be simple and to the point, and that anything more was vain idolatry.  They believed that it was their mission in life to purify the church of the last remnants of Catholicism, hence the name “Puritans”.  Not only did the Puritans believe that their worship should be simple, but that to have a Godly life, they should lead a life of simplicity, frugality, and a no frills lifestyle. By the mid 1600’s most of the English Parliament was controlled by the Puritans.  A Puritan Parliament combined with an Anglican king was a tinderbox waiting to explode. When King Charles I attempted to arrest five Puritan members of the House of Commons, Parliament revolted. 

By 1642 England was at war with itself.  Those aligned with the Puritan Parliament, called “Roundheads” were led by a general named Oliver Cromwell, the royalists were called the “Cavaliers”.  The Roundheads were victorious, King Charles I was convicted of treason and beheaded, while Oliver Cromwell assumed the power of a military dictator.  As soon as the Puritans secured control over the country, they sought to fulfill their Talibanesque mission to purify England of frivolity, promiscuity, and decadence.  Everything that was considered fun at the time was banned including dancing, theater, prostitution, gambling, drinking, pugilism, animal fights, and non-religious music. 

Among the many victims of the Puritans was Christmas.  To them there was nothing worse than to honor the name of Jesus by drinking, feasting, decorating, gift giving, and revelry.  The strict Puritan writer Philip Stubbes commented on Christmas, “More mischief is that time committed than in all the year besides … What dicing and carding, what eating and drinking, what banqueting and feasting is then used … to the great dishonour of God and the impoverishing of the realm.”

In 1644 Cromwell enforced a Parliamentary Act making Christmas celebrations illegal.  Everything from candy canes to meat pies to Christmas trees, Santa Claus, and the classic movie “A Christmas Story” was outlawed.  When the Grinch stole Christmas his icy heart was melted when he saw the people of Whoville singing and celebrating regardless.  When English citizens were caught celebrating Christmas, they could be fined, flogged, locked in the stocks, imprisoned, or perhaps even hanged.  To replace Christmas, the Puritans instituted a day long mandatory worship service, a long and dreary event involving fasting and prayer, which all had to attend by law.  As you can imagine, these laws were not very popular among the masses.  Despite the harsh punishments exacted for breaking the law, most ignored the ban, celebrating the holiday in secret.

After Cromwell’s death in 1658, the Puritan government in England collapsed and King Charles II regained his father’s throne.  The ban on Christmas was lifted in 1660.  While Christmas was legalized in England, in the Puritan colonies of Massachusetts, Christmas was still an illegal holiday subject to the harshest punishments. 

…and a lot of people these days call Catholics Talibans.